by - Sunday, August 02, 2015

"People never learn anything by being told, they have to find out for themselves."
- Veronika Decides To Die by Paulo Coelho

Turning 26 this month has gotten me lost in introspection, mentally doing a life inventory which made me initially come up with this list clinging to the last few days of my being 25.

Being in our 20s is one of the most crucial phases of our lives where we transition to the world of adulthood which some of us feel shitty about because honestly, we don't feel like we're ready (nobody actually is), and we don't know exactly what we're doing with our goddamned lives, and it sucks. We feel so lost, and there is no concrete map laid out to navigate our career path, and that's where we begin to feel self-doubt, discouraged, disappointed, confused, and all those crappy feelings that go with it, but it's okay, we're not supposed to figure everything out.

As we go through with our daily lives, we experience a great deal of things where we extract lessons from, and here are a few of mine:

1. If your day had been crappier than it ever was, sleep it off. You'll feel better at most the next day.

2. Throw off your status anxiety by dropping an anchor to social comparison. Stop comparing yourself to others on Instagram, Facebook, and other forms of social media, not only you'll drown in self pity, it also doesn't get you anywhere. We just have to accept that some people are more successful than us, but don't stop from there, instead, you should work on improving yourself which is far better than being stuck whilst begrudging others.

3. I'm socially awkward. Awkward to the point of me avoiding conversations and entirely keeping my distance to people which could be misinterpreted as rude, weird, and antisocial. It actually bothers me of what might people think, but I've come to accept that it's a normal part of growing up. You should too! Before, I get easily intimated by people because I'm afraid of rejection (I've got issues, I know), but I've learned to be confident enough to talk to them and not freak them out with my awkwardness. Sometimes, all it takes is mentally preparing yourself when socializing with others. I'm an anxious person, and I still am though, a bit, and it takes plenty of practice building self confidence when talking to people.

4. I, for one, am a big procrastinator. I've had my share of experiences too with putting off tasks especially difficult (dreadful) ones that I succumb to temptation watching funny cat videos on YouTube, checking social media sites thoughtlessly getting sucked right into the black hole of feeds, and clicking aimlessly on links asking yourself 2-1/2 hours later, how did I even get here?

For sure, it's easier said than done, taking real courage to learn self discipline. It's a mindset. If you really want to get things done, you gotta take advanced measures like gadget freeing your desk away from distraction.

When going online to complete a task, only open work-related websites and don't ever think about clicking on those bookmarked pages. If you want, you can hide them for the meantime and restore them when you're done.

Turn off notifications on your devices, so you wont get tempted to text, email, or comment on a friend's status/photos.

You can also make a list prioritizing what needs to be done ASAP and make that your goal or write a sticky note reminder on your vision board, pc screen, or anywhere visible and then crash it out or tick that up when you're done and see how liberating that feels.

You can add your own idea too. You can get creative with ways you can be productively lazy.

5. Drink responsibly. Nuff said.

6. If you have doubts perhaps purchasing an item, don't buy it cause most definitely you'll regret it because if you really want it, you need not have to think twice.

7. Regular exercise is very important. Eat healthy. Take care of your body. It's the only one you've got.

8. What you studied in college won’t probably matter in your future career.

9. Let go of an abusive relationship. I used to have a boyfriend who throws verbal punches at me, and I respect myself enough not to tolerate his bullshit and left him even my heart was breaking.

10. Destiny is an illusion. You are where you are and you are what you become because of your life choices, so make the best one.

11. Don't give a flying fuck to what others think. Don't be scared to be yourself. 

12. The daily grind, more often than not, drains the life out of you. Take a mental health day. Spend time doing nothing. Take a vacation. Stay in bed whole day watching funny movies wolfing down comfort food (no one will judge you). Run a hot bath. It's absolutely up to you. The idea is to relax, to rest before reverting back to slavery your busy schedule.

13. You don't fully understand something if you can't explain it in simple words.

14. Active listening is vital.

15. Spend time with your family especially your parents. While you're so busy growing up, they're growing older too.

16. Invest in working clothes, your style, that you're comfortable wearing. You can't just wear jeans and t-shirt with holes in them to work, like, forever. Gradually detox your wardrobe.

17. Don't let your world revolve around one guy/girl. Make it two (joke). I mean, you've got to have a life of your own aside from when you're with him/her. "Love yourself before it's made illegal", a line from an Incubus' song, Warning. Don't stop your hobbies or cancel out plans with friends just to be with him/her in a last-minute notice. Stop being clingy. It's kind of okay for awhile, but it becomes annoying over time.

18. Stop being in the fast lane. You've got to slow down sometimes. Live in the now. Be mentally present. Take digital breaks.

19. If you feel like skipping work, just get your ass up. That lazy feeling goes away once you hit the shower, get dressed, and go out there.

20. Be grateful with what you have.

21. There is nothing wrong with failing.

22. Start a financial plan as early as you can. Pay off your debt. Beat impulse buying and out-of-whim online shopping. Live below your means. Save more money while you're still young. You'll thank yourself many years later.

23. Law of attraction works.

24. Stop being a p*ssy. Take that risk and see where it takes you.

25. Cut loose from your messy past. Future is for new beginnings. Every day is a fresh start.

"She would consider each day a miracle - which indeed it is, when you consider the number of unexpected things that could happen in each second of our fragile existences."

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